Finding - Kerry Lichlyter

[Larry Robinson]

Finding

The Hindus tell the story
that God was trying to choose a place
where He could hide from man.
Where was the last place
that man would think to look
for Him?  
And he chose
the human heart.

I have always looked for God—
for my Soul, for that matter—
within. 
Psalm 46 says the Lord of Hosts is
within.
Guru Nanak, whoever he is, 
said,
So doth thy Lord abide within thee,
Why search Him without?

So when I meditated
I always focused inside.
Somewhere within my heart of hearts.
The upper room.
The inner sanctum.

But, God bless us, language
is powerful.
Within.
Tiny.
Small.
The still, small voice—
barely squeaking from inside
the left ventricle.

Maybe, I thought,
it was like a black hole:
if you go within enough—
past the event horizon—
and on through to another dimension,
it opens out again.

But it never did.

Lately, however, 
I have had a different experience.
It is me that is small.
It is me that is hard and tiny.

My soul is large.
My soul surrounds me
and covers me like a blanket.
That desire to have someone
hold you in his arms and
let your head rest on his chest
is what the soul is like.

For the soul is immense.
It extends.
The incarnation is small,
but the soul is huge.
Warm.
Comforting.
Healing.

I like this new vision
of my soul.
I will consider it
a spiritual breakthrough.

But that’s only me. 
Little me, the ego, 
consciousness,
the body.

One day, all those things
will be gone.
But my soul will remain.
Joyous.
Expansive.
Me, as well.

I have not searched Him without.
I have just reconfigured the relationship.

O My Soul.

For the Creative Forces,
The Great Spirit,
the I-am-that-I-am,
is not without,
or within.
It is everywhere.

		- Kerry Lichlyter




“Be joyful though you have considered all the facts.”
	- Wendell Berry