Sarcoma Bodhisattva - Barry Vesser

[Larry Robinson]

Sarcoma Bodhisattva
For Alice Jean
 
I was astonished
Your body so diminished
Emaciated by disease
And yet your radiance
Drew me to you as 
Irresistibly as gravity.
 
Yes, you were – are
A goddess, warrior, princess,
But even those words 
Cannot contain you.
Cannot hold your joy,
Your curiosity, your courage,
your willingness, your presence.
 
It was as if your smile 
Peeled the blinders
From my eyes and said
“Here, see, this is life.
You have been looking at it 
All along and missing it.
Come stand in the light 
With me now.”
 
Your words were so
Direct and simple
Whether describing
The details of your 
Illness, how it
would suck 
Your energy
leaving you 
exhausted,
Or how atuned 
Dudely’s care 
and love were
to your new needs,
Or your journey
Of awakening,
Or letting your visitor
Know that it was
Time to go now.
 
 
In those last days
Almost everything
Had fallen away:
Your need to take 
Care of others,
To be in charge 
Of your life, 
Even control over 
your body.
You had emerged 
from the “goo”
Bright, clear, fragile
And as intricate as
Butterfly wings;
And ready to let go 
of even that.
 
You did not offer answers,
But the light of your Being,
Your love enveloped me
As it did everything
That it encountered.
It was a gift that
Opened me, that I 
Could not help but 
To try and give back.
 
So you awoke in me
A willingness that 
Had become a stranger, 
A willingness to drop
My need for safety
And control.
Your vibrant presence
Inviting me to meet you
In this moment,
Completely alive
Dancing on 
the edge of death.
 
Bodhi Svaha!

	- Barry Vesser
 
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