Now I Am Dying - Bruce Moody

[Larry Robinson]

Now I Am Dying
 
Now I am dying my life reviews itself just before I wake.
Not in sheets of recollection 
but bits and in pieces I forgot ‘till now
and will not recount to you,
because they are perfectly mine,
to be recognized by me alone, and so would bore you,
and because the same may happen to you 
on the days before you die. 
 
I would not deprive you of that curious re-happening, 
now, when present names depart, and old ones are secure
as stone. And trips
and games and trees that seemed to mean nothing then,
return with living tang.
 
I have no warning for you. I would if I had one
give you one because you are my friend,
and so I champion you.
 
Though your name forget, as these days drift into dusk,
and unrecorded apertures open and the sky is mine,
and lost faces disembark the past which sails away
as though no voyage ever promised came to pass
or could.
 
Not to disturb you I set this down. But to ease your mind.
It will come, unbidden, raw, and easy. Like the growth of hair.
Like seas at night which no one sees but you. 
You and The Messenger whose courtesy knocks 
on the door of your sleep and tells you,
 
remember: no one lives in vain, who has stored away
such mute treasure, or who has lived in excess to it.
 
	- Bruce Moody